All words that I don’t really like to have in my vocabulary. Or at least when it comes to describing myself. When I do something I do it 110%. Whether it is tackling my “to-do” list, training for something, serving my family or fulfilling a commitment. I’m going to give it my all. I think this is a great quality to have to some extent. But what happens on those days when I just can’t pull it together and my capacity is just average? I’m functioning but not at my best.
Well, I’ll tell you what happens. I drive myself crazy!
Truth is, it is really hard for me to have just an okay day, to make just an okay dinner, to not have amazing, super stimulating and educational activities for my kids everyday and not be super productive in every minute of the day. At least until everything I wanted to get done has been accomplished. This probably is my answer to why there are days when I just crash. No one is judging me for having an off day. But I’m judging myself enough for everyone. This makes me try harder and more times than not puts me in a worse situation.
Truth? There is nothing wrong with just okay days. Truth? There’s nothing wrong with bad days even. They just happen. I know this. But I don’t like it. No one can function at 100% at ALL times. We can’t control it all or do it all. More times than not, “off” days have nothing to do with us. The only thing we can be responsible for is our response.
Trying harder is not the ticket.
Letting go is.
Taking in His grace.
Pushing away the lies.
Being okay with just being okay at times.
Because God’s okay with it. He’s okay with me and not surprised. In fact, I believe He draws nearer, listens more intently and waits for me to just say the words.
I need help. I can’t do it.
And He simply responds:
I know. I’m here.
That’s what I want. That’s all I need. Because he’s WAY more than average on any given day. Especially when average is all I got.
How do you handle when average is all you got?