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it’s okay to be grey.

When I was pregnant with the girls I was put on bedrest for the last 6 weeks. Mason had just turned 2. Like any 2 year old he was busy. Hanging out on the couch doing puzzles and coloring with mommy was not an option. But he did like TV. So TV it was. ALOT of TV. Also, the mac-n-cheese and PB&J’s were plentiful. Anything that was easy was my go to. We didn’t have family around to help us. Thankfully we had a small group from church that jumped in to help anyway they could. As much as we appreciated this our house became a revolving door of people in and out. It was a lot for even our extroverted son. The “normal” life our 2 year old had once lived had been turned upside down. As a result of all the change and stress in our home our little guy developed a stutter. This was heartbreaking for me. I felt responsible and guilty. I was convinced I had ruined him for life. Not to mention all the TV and mac-n-cheese he was consuming on a daily basis. Oh, the picture I had conceived in my head was not pretty.

Well you can probably guess how the story ended…continued I should say. The girls were born, life resumed once again. Or we eventually found a new normal. The TV was not on quite as much. We still served mac-n-cheese and PB&J but not on a daily basis. Because it’s still a tasty meal! His stutter continued for some time but we learned how to help him and even prevent it mostly. Still, to this day when he is over tired or over stimulated his stutter will come back. Actually, I am thankful for it now. It’s a good check for us when we need to slow down.

What did I learn from this time? I learned it was a season. Life had crazy circumstances for awhile. We made adjustments accordingly and there were side effects. But it was not permanent. I didn’t ruin Mason for life. He bounced right back and adjusted to his new life very well.

Seasons happen all the time in life. Some are hard. Real hard. We deal with them the best we know how. Sometimes its easy and we soak it in and enjoy it while it lasts. But when it’s  hard I try to remember that seasons are just that, a relatively short amount of time that will soon pass. We have to make the best decisions we can at that time, trust that God knows best and we’ll be okay. Most importantly, as moms we have to remember that our kids will be okay. They are resilient and will bounce right back. Don’t go extreme. Stay out of the black and white. Settle in the grey for awhile. It’s okay. Believe that soon this shall pass and then there will be something new.

Why am I saying this? I am in a season of parenting right now that is trying. I am constantly doubting myself, praying for wisdom and the perseverance to trust in His sovereignty. Trusting this is a season, a temporary time that will soon pass. I have to stay on the path and keep moving forward. Don’t go extreme, just stay in the grey. It’s okay to be grey!

How do you handle seasons in your life? What kind of season are you in right now?

Filed under: life


I'm a wife to 1 amazing husband. A mom to 1 little dude and 2 girlie girls. A follower of the ONE who saved me. A daughter to 2 wonderful people. A sister to 1. A friend to many. A runner because that's what I do to keep from not going crazy. And the CEO of this little part of the world we call home.


  1. Pingback: When Change Becomes the Strategy | Brian Barela

  2. I really, really love this post. It is probably one of my favorites. I have read it at least twice now :) You are such an amazing mom, Aubrey. You allow God to work in your life no matter the moment or season. You always let Him in. And I wish we had known one another during that time so I could have been praying for you. But I am praying now!!!

  3. James Dobson says this about difficult times in parenting. Sometimes we just need to “get through it.” In other words, we may not be making progress going up and hopefully we are not going down. Just maintain for right now (a season). Hang in there!!!

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